Perfectionism is a personality trait. It involves a strong desire to achieve flawlessness. Many people see it as a positive quality. In this post we will discuss about how to overcome perfectionism. However, it often becomes a harmful way to cope. Negative perfectionism is linked to self-criticism and competitiveness. It also leads to strict organization and sensitivity to criticism.
We should analyze our habits because the perfectionist mindset is learned. Fortunately, the good news is that we can unlearn it over time. By gradually adopting healthier habits, we can ultimately overcome perfectionism and create lasting change.
Let’s explore 10 specific habits that can be practiced to help release the grip of perfectionism.
1. Refocusing your Gifts
Embracing perfectionism as a positive quality can help you channel it in healthy ways. Instead of aiming for perfection, think about how you excel at refining things. This shift in perspective allows you to focus on improving rather than fixating on flawless results. By looking at perfectionism differently, you can change your mindset and behavior. This change is important because being self-critical due to perfectionism is not helpful. A positive outlook can lead to better habits and greater satisfaction.
2. Start to normalize Failure
Let’s get used to failure as a normal part of the journey to success. One way to do this is by reading about successful people and how they dealt with their failures. Look for stories or interviews where they talk about their setbacks.
Next, take a look at your own failures. Make a list of them and write down the good things that came from those experiences. We often think of failure as something bad. However, it is just a natural part of the road to success.
It’s important to realize that understanding what doesn’t work is as crucial as knowing what does. By talking about failure more openly, we can stop seeing it as the end of the world when it happens.
3. Use a timer
It’s important to set deadlines for both big projects and small tasks. For example, if you need to do research, set a timer for 30 minutes. After that, take notes. Then, give yourself 45 minutes to proofread.
Setting these time limits helps create boundaries. They prevent perfectionism from slowing you down. Deadlines are essential for getting things done. By setting deadlines for both big projects and small tasks, you can manage your time more effectively.
4. break big tasks into smaller steps
Let’s remember to break down big tasks into smaller steps. When we tackle a large project, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. This can make us lose focus and let perfectionism take control.
By breaking the project into manageable steps, we can navigate these challenges more easily. This method stimulates positive reinforcement in our brains. It boosts motivation and reduces the impact of perfectionism.
Additionally, this approach helps us shift our perspective and recognize our progress. It’s a simple yet powerful way to overcome perfectionism.
5. Ask for negative feedback
Instead of asking questions that only get positive feedback, it’s important to seek negative feedback. For example, avoid questions like “What do you think of this?” or “What was your experience?” Instead, encourage the person you worked with to provide constructive criticism. You can ask, “Where could this be improved?” or “What could I have done better here?”
Some perfectionists may struggle with negative feedback. They might prefer to hear only positive comments. However, it’s crucial to become comfortable with negative feedback. See it as an opportunity for improvement.
By focusing on how negative feedback can help you grow, you can shift your mindset. Instead of striving for perfection, actively seek ways to improve. You can ask for negative feedback in surveys, polls, or requests for testimonials.
Developing a habit of asking for constructive criticism will help you continuously improve and refine your work.
6. Change the way we speak to ourselves.
Making a shift in the way we talk to ourselves is an essential step in overcoming perfectionism. Take a moment to grab a sticky note or a pad, and note down these four empowering mantras:
a) It doesn’t have to be perfect to be powerful.
Place this reminder where you’ll see it often. Embrace the idea that, despite imperfections, your work can still have a strong impact. Remember, it doesn’t need to be flawless to make a meaningful difference. By keeping this in mind, you’ll be more motivated to take action and move forward, rather than getting stuck in the pursuit of perfection.
b) Progress, Not Perfection
As perfectionists, we often focus on our imperfections. This makes us forget to acknowledge the progress we’ve made. Instead of only looking at the results, we should appreciate the positive direction we are heading in.
By focusing on our progress and the gradual improvement of our work, we can let go of perfectionism. Recognizing how far we’ve come helps us feel more satisfied with our efforts.
c) Done is Better Than Perfect
If you have many unfinished projects because you’re striving for perfection, remember that completing them is more important. Your work won’t have an impact until it’s out in the world. People won’t notice what’s missing because your work will still be valuable to them.
Whether in your work or personal life, getting things done is better than trying to be perfect. Taking action will help you improve over time. However, trying to achieve perfection before making progress will get you nowhere.
7. Trust the mother-loving process
“Trust the mother-loving process.” Write this down everywhere. As perfectionists, we often try to control every step and predict the outcome. However, we need to trust that everything will unfold as it should. This will lead us to where we need to be in the future.
We may not know the entire path, but we still need to trust the process. This trust can only develop through practice and experience. So, remind yourself to trust the process regularly. As you do this, you’ll start to see that things are unfolding beautifully.
8. Ask for help
Make a conscious effort to seek help, even when you don’t feel like it. Even if you don’t need it. Set reminders or create systems that encourage you to ask for assistance. For example, add a daily task to your to-do list to remind yourself to delegate and seek help. This way, you’ll remember that you don’t have to do everything alone for it to be done well.
For perfectionists, letting go can be tough. Start by asking for help with small tasks, like getting assistance with assignments or finding your books. Over time, make it a habit to express gratitude for any help, even if it’s not perfect.
By normalizing asking for and receiving help, you will attract more support. The quality of help will also improve. Remember, to get the support you need, you have to be willing to ask for it first.
9. Let the things go
It’s important to remember that striving for perfection does not mean giving up. As perfectionists, we often hold ourselves to high standards. We seek progress and achievement in our lives. However, our fixation on perfection can hinder our actual progress.
The idea of “progress, not perfection” is crucial. Letting go of the need for everything to be perfect is necessary for genuine progress. It’s about understanding that things will improve over time as long as we allow ourselves to move forward.
Remind yourself that it’s okay to let things go. This doesn’t mean you’re giving up. It doesn’t mean you’re going backward, lazy, or unmotivated. These thoughts may cross your mind, but they are not true. Letting go of perfection allows you to make progress.
Establishing this mindset as a habit is essential. You can do this by placing visible reminders, like sticky notes, in prominent locations such as your mirror or journal. You can also add reminders to your daily to-do list. Consistently seeing these reminders will help you internalize this perspective and make it part of your thought process.
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10. celebrate not your wins but your mistakes
It’s important to celebrate both your victories and your mistakes. As perfectionists, it can be hard to acknowledge our accomplishments. However, recognizing our mistakes is even more essential.
Why should we celebrate mistakes? They are stepping stones to progress and opportunities for learning. Mistakes provide wisdom and help us refine our skills. To truly excel in any endeavor, we need to understand it well. Making mistakes along the way aids in our learning and personal growth. This leads to strength, resilience, mindfulness, health, and balance.
By embracing and celebrating our mistakes, we can normalize them. This helps us release any shame or need to hide them. Cultivating a habit of celebrating mistakes allows us to acknowledge their value. It helps us let go of our fixation on them and make significant progress.
